Cross Your Fingers For Me Guys!!!

Criticise Everything readers, cross your fingers for me please. I just wrote an email to Ynaija.com, the biggest Youth platform in the country (if not the continent) concerning my desire to write a column for them. This has been my dream and I pray you guys will pray for me. Thank You.

War Against Indiscipline: A Blast From The Past.

One may understand that the current president of tbe Federal Republic of Nigeria,  Muhammadu buhari has a lot of flaws, and to some extent, has a terrible history with Nigeria dating from his Military Regime from 1983 to 1985. He has been known to pay deaf ears to Nigerian demands of him as a leader, but rather, he believes he is still a Military Head of State who has the country in his palm and can squeeze it like a play dough. Not only is the Nigerian economy in shambles, the government is in turmoil and confusion. In addition to that, the government lacks brains to back up the incredible promises used by the APC to lure innocent Nigerians into voting them,  therefore the government lacks a thought for priority. One would assume the government of cluelessness could not get any worse.

But Buhari's government will try their best to proove you wrong...

Right now, the President has ( Without the knowledge of the Masses) inaugurated an agency called War Against Indiscipline (WAI), A rebirth of Muhammadu Buhari's 1983 doom-bringer. Nobody liked WAI back in the day. Actually, the WAI was the more like dictatorial government back then which made nonsense of human rights in the name of maintaining discipline in Nigeria. The WAI was made up of military men, some of which stood in the streets looking for who to dish out some strokes of the koboko to and doing so ruthlessly whenever the opportunity came. This military men were more like Ambassadors of Buhari, standing around and terrorizing the country, and this was the #1 reason Buhari's government from 1983-1985 was highly criticized and infamous.

Now the Big Cats are back, and will roar soon...

Buhari has brought them back, and this time, nobody should expect different from what we had back then, and nobody should bring up the case of Democracy and fundamental human rights because that is not what anyone in this government cares about. The government is full of people with 0% ideas, 0% enthiusiasm to move the country ahead, 0% rational thinking, 0% thoughts towards priority and 100% emptiness of brains and fullness of bank accounts. Right now, twitter is on fire on this topic and its not even those on twitter that will be affected by this, (afterall, twittizens are mostly middle class Nigerian youths) but the poor woman on the street who has no gainful means of a living, the elderly retired civil servant whose pension has become history, the young schoolboy who barely knows discipline because of the poor education and the helpless illiterates who didnt get education at all. They are the ones that will be whipped and sent to carry heavy blocks atop their heads, not because of indiscipline, but because they will not have enough money to settle the WAI officers. How does Buhari waste money creating unnecesary agencies when Nigeria is not in order due to his other misconducts? How does he even expect discipline in a country where people are hungry? I cant answer that, but i do have to tell Nigerians who put Buhari where he is now...

You Loved Buhari.
You Voted Buhari.
Enjoy Buhari.

Vic O is at it Again!

 Edo born Nigerian rapper Vic O is one who has made name in the Nigerian music industry for his 'wonderful' lunch lines.-Yes, Lunch lines because "He kills beats and gives it to his fans to eat"- has announced through his twitter handle @VicOTVs that he will be releasing a new "jam" which will be titled "Nigeria needs Deliverance" in which he criticises the Nigerian government in so many deep words which am sure will touch this unsurprisingly hard hearted government. Earlier before tje news was released, Vic O tormented helpless twitter followers into giving him 3 reasons why they love Vic O for a prize or perhaps a price of $1K . The twitter followers showered him with praises. I mean, I would shower Hitler with praises for $1K... No, that was a joke. But then, no money has been released to anybody and Vic O's twitter timeline is filled with tweets of how powerful his lyrics are and how he is loved by all. Look at him saying Nigeria needs deliverance while its him we need deliverance from. Here are some powerful lines from #NigeriaNeedsDeliverance.

Amazing and breathtaking, right?

Rio: Nigeria as Usual.

So, I am sure you must have heard it (One way or the other) that there is a lot of controversy around the Nigerian Athletes might just have to sponsor themselves up to the point of paying for their flight tickets to Rio de Janerio for the Olympic games. Funny enough, a huge sum of money was allocated to the training and support of #TeamNigeria but there has been lots of talks and talks from the Minister Of Sports (Solomon Dalung) which (according to Twittizens) does not hold water. Its obvious there is foul play somewhere and that those millions have entered some pockets, private of course. I do hope my readers are not surprised. I mean, "we" voted for #Change and here we are. The wonderful and promising athletes did well by not waiting so long to listen to the Mumbo Jumbo presented by the government, instead, they sprang to action, reaching Nigerians and asking for generous donations that could help them out.
 Also, one might begin to ask what our Anti-kwarupt president has to do about this. And the EFCC still has their arms folded.

Solomon Dalung
Minister of Sports.

The Last One For A Few Days.

Name : Victor Nnebe
Location Now: Awka, Anambra State, Nigeria
Location in 24 Hours: Los Angeles, United State... Kidding. Burj Al Arab, Dubai. Kidding again. Mea Mater Elizabeth High School,Agbani, Enugu State. Not Kidding.
Location For The Next 90 Days: Mea Mater Elizabeth High School, Agbani.

Mood: This Information Can not be disclosed here.

Warnings: While the author is in school, Blog readers are allowed to send emaila thereby gaining him pageviews anyways. Also leave comments.

Social Networks and Their Annoyingnesses.

A reader of my blog complained about how annoyed she is at whatsapp messages that arrive her phone. I was not surprised. I get it a lot. Social network is just like that.

1. Facebook's Like and Type Amen. I wonder what people gain these days from facebook likes. I mean, really. Its facebook for wailing out loud, nobody takes it serious. It used to be legit, when people would put up prayers and ask for Amen. But now you can just come on facebook and see a picture of Jesus and am asked to type Amen. Really. Amen to a picture?. Even at times people photoshop really disturbing things or put up disgusting pictures and just say type Amen. I find those picture disturbing. They go to the extent of threatning by saying you will have seven years of badluck if you dont type Amen. No. Really. No.

2. Twitter's unseriousness with everything. Not only is twitter the funniest social network, it has several accounts that are just too unserious just like @Trailerjamshow who just goes around looking for casted souls to air.

3. Tweeters' eagerness to tweet everything. A tweeter is someone on twitter (dont get confused). People just tweet and tweet and tweet stuff that are not sensitive to other people's feelings.

4. Whatsapp and its 'Send to 30 friends, dont break the chain' thing. People just send mass messages of stories and fabricated health information accross and tell you to send it to friends. Not only is this the case, the spellings and words used are always wrong.

5.  Snapchat is too slow

6. Xup. I mean... I hate it when people say xup.

Ok. These are just mine. I cant wait to hear yours

Femi Fani-Kayode: This Dangerous Tweet.

PDP is the opposition party of the country and they have only one job and that is to point out the wrongdoings of the party in power. Of course in a game of politics, anything that does not break the rule goes, therefore, if there is anything the government is not getting right, PDP is supposed to show Nigeria by saying  "Look at the government you voted in and see why you should vote us in next"
Now people like Ben Murray-Bruce, Reno Omokri, Ayo Fayose and Femi fani-Kayode are on twitter 24/7 writing microblogs that is supposed to change this Change. But then, what happens when you go this far?

Olufemi! No! What are you saying? What do you know? Even if you know something, what is your proof?
I do suggest the PDP should warn its members against such so that we dont get to have problems. The tweet has been long deleted though.