Dont Kill Yourself

I really didn't know what title to give this write up that wouldn't be cliché. I mean, the topic at hand is probably the most cliché one you've seen because it appears we keep talking about it. Well, let's cut the chase. I'm going to write about drugs. Chances are, if you're reading this magazine, you're most likely not a drug user (Trust me, I don't do a lot of maths, but I did the maths, and I believe most drug users wouldn't want to pick up a blogpost to read). Genius, right? My point is, you most likely don't use drugs. It doesn't really matter if you do or don't, but maybe the message in this write up will be easier to relate to if you aren't already hooked onto something (i.e addiction).
Forgive me, I write directly from my mind and I do a lot of beating around the bush while doing that. This is just a write up convincing you not to do drugs if you aren't already doing it, or persuading you to get yourself out of it if you realise you've fallen in.
Listen, I'm going to make it as simple as possible in order for you to understand because many drug users, and drug users to - be ignore all the warnings when the means of warning seems boring, and irrelevant.
I would've asked you if you knew what if feels like to commit suicide, but I strongly doubt you'd be alive if you committed suicide. Well, you think it takes you a gun to the head or a rope to the fan to commit suicide? Think again. You can continually kill your own self, all the while thinking you're enjoying yourself or, well, "catching cruise".
You know these drugs by name; codeine, tramadol, xanax, LSD and a lot of others, and, well, there's no justifying taking it, because, like I said, you're literally shooting your own self in the head. I've written a similar article for the Timeline Blog, and just like I did there, I'll give you very practical reasons why you shouldn't do drugs.
 I'm not a science student, and I know very little about the human brain and other parts of the body, so my reasons will be more emotional than physical.
First of all, I'm not going to lie to you, but yes, drugs feel good. I mean, really good. Like, extremely really good. Don't ask me my source of that knowledge, but just know it. Well, drugs feel awesome when you take them, but anybody with sense knows one thing, and that is the fact that sweet things also kill, and things that feel good can also end up messing up your entire life.
Many of these drugs mess with your head. I bet you've been near a hard drug user, and you'll notice they aren't always complete. It appears they are either high, or they want to be high. Now, personally,  I wouldn't want to be emotionally incomplete because of constant use of substances that only give me momentary joy and go on to mess up the rest of my life. When you constantly take drugs, your alertness level drops, and you start being less of yourself and more of a floating self.
Drug abuse usually leads to addiction. Codeine for example is highly addictive. A simple definition of addiction is a state whereby you've had a thing for so much you can't do without it anymore. Don't expect a scientific explanation of why and how addiction works, I just know the human mind can be very unpredictable and can do things we don't want it to do. I mean, we all love enjoying ourselves and it's man's natural instinct to have as much fun as possible. But we definitely don't want a situation whereby our 'fun' takes control of us and we can't do anything about it. It's akin to being a criminal in a prison. You're locked up and even though in this case, you're enjoying yourself in this prison, in the end, you're still caged. You  start up by controlling these things and prescribing time for taking it  (let's say you'll tell yourself that you can only take lean -i.e codeine- two nights a week), but as you keep taking, first of all, you'll keep needing higher doses to keep you slow (that's what lean does) and before you know it, two nights a week turns to three nights a week, and then five nights a week, and then you start taking it in the day, and before you know it, you find yourself needing more and more. Like I said, you start by telling yourself when to take it, but sooner or later, the drug will seem to be the one telling you "guy, time don reach oo", and you become trapped because you just can’t say no when it calls on you. Plus, when you can't get access to the drug anymore, that's when you beging to face another problem altogether.
Be honest with yourself, the drugs won't always be available for you everytime. Your supplier can always get busted, or he'll run out of product. Also have in mind that these drugs cost money, and, well, money isn't really a resource that stays forever, so when you're broke, it doesn't mean your body will say "Oya let's chill for him to get money", no, you'll still crave it, and you'll see yourself stealing phone up and down or going to do ‘bambiala’ by begging for money like you have no parents that send you money. Withdrawal symptoms are real. If you start, it's nearly impossible to stop.
You watch a lot of music videos and hear a lot of lyrics about drugs and how it's good and "My lean cost more than your rent" and all that, and you believe that's the way to go. I'd have to first of all remind you that you're not a trap artist, you don't know if many of them take these things or just put them in their songs because they know some not-so-smart people will like the song more, and also, people in the industry have died of drug abuse too (you can Google Amy Winehouse or Lil Peep) and some others like Lil Wayne (who literally carries Purple Drank -A mixture of lean and other substances) suffered a seizure recently from the drugs. Also, these guys can afford to buy lean that cost more than your rent, but can you? Can you afford it? Think.
If you're reading this up to this point, I bet you haven't lost interest and said "This guy is talking nonsense. It's my life, let me live it", but if you still think same, you're right. It's your life. I like being realistic so, yes, it's your life, and I mean, everyone will die someday isn't it? If it's not your time to die, you won't die, right? That's what religious people believe,  yes? Stop fooling yourself, and stop killing yourself also. Life is meant to be enjoyed, but not by committing suicide.
A few steps on how to avoid them are to distract yourself with something, get involved in something much bigger than you (maybe join the drug free club if you’re into clubs and meetings), you can become religious since religion boosts morals and would totally preach against drug abuse, you can be careful who you hang around and who you’re seen with, you should ‘flee’ wherever drugs are being abused and get involved in other fun activities (anything).
They are all tough things to do, especially in a world, or an environment where drug abuse is rampant, and you may say you should as well join in, but be reminded that what works for Peter may not work for Paul.
So, now I give you two options.
1. You take tons of codeine, trams, ref, xanax and all that. Have a few minutes of good high, or good low ( depending on what you like), and end up dying like some pig.
2. You avoid these deadly drugs, do something else that gives you joy, happiness and pleasure ( anything else but drugs) and not end up dying like some pig.

Honestly, dying like some stupid pig shouldn't sound right to you except you're currently very high or not bright upstairs. Choose life. Avoid drugs.

Don't Just Keep Quiet, Do Something: A Brief Write-Up on what Nigeria and Nigerians need.

You don’t need to be on Twitter to have heard about the #EndSARS hash tag that has been circulating throughout the internet and has been making very serious waves across the country since about four days ago. If you’re not clear on the whole thing, I’ll give you an insight. SARS means Special Anti Robbery Squad, and it is a branch or subdivision of the Nigerian Police which was supposedly created to combat armed robbery. Unfortunately, members of the SARS division have done a terrible job since its creation, and have barely helped solve the social issue it was brought to solve. Worst of all, these men, who are armed, and usually wear no uniforms or any form of identity seem to constitute much more nuisance in our society than even the armed robbers. Every day, the youths in Nigeria get physically abused by members of the SARS who usually fabricate crazy stories about what occupation they ‘assume’ the young person engages in. They can see a well dressed young man with an iPhone and a laptop, and an automatic assumption and conclusion is that such person is fraudulent and partakes in advanced fee fraud, or they see a well dressed lady and she becomes a prostitute. This is usually followed by great brutality, slapping, kicking, threats to kill, and in a lot of cases, killing of an innocent young person. You see, you don’t need to be on Twitter to have heard about #EndSARS, or to know the story of the evil these people commit, or to know that our country as a whole has a very big problem – I mean very big problems- that need to be solved. The hash tag is meant to be a reaction by the angered youths on social media calling for the government to dissolve the SARS section of the police.
Our president, in my opinion, is doing just as well as a deformed vegetable would do in office. He hasn’t given any response to the Nigerian plea for people to scrap SARS, and there has been no official word from the presidency. OK, we may say it’s because Twitter is a social network, and a government being led by an uneducated man, and led by other uneducated, or simply people that couldn’t care any less about the country they lead. The sensible ones on Twitter then decided to call on an actual rally, a protest on the streets against SARS, and funny enough, that same day, the auditions for Big Brother Nigeria held. There were over 200,000 tweets concerning #EndSARS, but the number of people who came out to protest was disappointing. Mind you, it was a Saturday. The BBN auditions got a massive turnout anyway, because, well, an average youth would rather get a very slim chance of winning 200,000 USD than fixing a huge societal problem.
Nigerians have many problems, and each one seems to cause a bigger one, and the bigger one causes another very big one. It’s like one big chain, honestly. The issues seep very deep into all our systems that almost absolutely nothing works. However, the one problem that we have that has made others continue is the problem which Fela Anikulapo Kuti refers to as ‘Suffering and Smiling’. We are way too docile, and that is why the other problems such as corruption, bad leadership, and even foreign exploitation continue to mess our country up. We easily forget. And, we easily forgive. You see, this country has seen so many phases that would (in a developing, or developed country) throw the youths into a serious protest. In this country, the youths do nothing, and it is because they don’t know, and haven’t reasoned the negative impact every decision made by these leaders can cost us, and our children. We see a problem, we sit in our bedrooms, or under the bridge, and grumble, and do more grumbling, and give up. We believe our governments are untouchable, and that in the end, they have all the power.
No. It shouldn’t be that way. 200,000 tweets are just mere words to the government. They mean absolutely nothing. There was an episode of AJStream on Aljazeera after the tweets gained attention. Sadly, the AJ Stream featured one Abayomi Shogunle, the Assistant Commisioner of Police, and the man himself isn’t a very bright individual, and in my opinion doesn’t have the good of the nation at heart. Many good speakers such as @segalink and @Chydee also spoke. All good, but will that get the attention of the government? Not everybody is on Twitter, and if the youths realize this, it will go a long way.
We should understand that countries that have experienced change and development didn’t only have it because they had very good leaders (sadly, Nigeria has barely had that since the British left), it is because the citizens of these countries know when and how to protest in order to get the attention of the people. Here in our country, one man spear heads a protest against a law, or leads a cause against the government, and a threat is issued, and he dies down, or worse, they call him and the leaders of the protest, offer them millions of taxpayers’ money, and the whole thing goes away while the government’s bad law continues and everyone else suffers.
It may seem funny to use this example, but if you have watched Angry Birds: The Movie, you’d see that Nigerians are in a situation akin to that of the birds who were previously always happy, no matter what happened. When the Pigs stole their eggs, they remained happy, until Red (the protagonist) urged them that being happy wouldn’t solve their issues, and that they needed to be angry to get back their eggs. The bad leaders keep stealing our eggs, and keep messing up our future. Sitting at home will not solve it, tweeting may not solve it. When people come out en masse to protest, it shows the government that something needs to be done quick. We need to be angry, yet tactical.
In this country, nothing is working. It’s ridiculous (though not funny) how terrible things have gotten, and how satisfied we are with them. We worship these politicians who should be changing the country for good but are totally care free towards the people’s plea. This means that the time has come to act. When a government knows it’s citizens are always eager to remain quiet, they wouldn’t mind doing things wrongly and having the audacity to go internationally and declare that the people are happy under their government. Don’t just keep quiet, do something!  There is really no better time to act than now.

TO LIVE AND LET LIVE OR TO LIVE WITH SENTIMENT: AN ESSAY ON RELIGIOUS, BEHAVIOURAL, AND CULTURAL DIFFERENCES

We, as humans, have emotions, and feelings. We have feelings of what we see as right, and what we consider wrong. We have feelings based on what we see as natural, and what we see as quite unnatural. These feelings are deeply inbuilt, and even though they come with individuals, they are many times influenced by the society we live in. To break this down and save your time, it’s safe to say that people in the US think it is right for children to speak up to their parents when they feel they aren’t treated right. In Africa, many people don’t see that as right; your parents know what is best for you and whatever they are doing to you is actually something they are doing for you. You see? Different people hold different thoughts.
It doesn’t end there, with peoples’ differences; it also breaks into individuals and their thoughts. A generally accepted knowledge of what is wrong is that it is anything that causes unnecessary pain, and puts people into danger. Only a psychopath would disagree with this, and only a psychopath would find it OK to cause pain upon people. Have that in mind. Now, humans as individuals all have their own mindset on what they want to do to themselves, and how they want to live. Some people are OK being religious and chaste and being teetotalers, while some prefer clubbing, drinking, and ‘living life to the fullest’. You see? Different persons have different thoughts.
Now, this essay is going to dwell more on the saying “Live your own life”. Truly, man is guided by where he is and where he grew. Our ideas are usually guided by what others around us think and our pattern of thoughts are usually aligned in one direction. This is why many people find it difficult to understand things, or patterns of thoughts that aren’t theirs. Africa will be my case study, and Nigeria will be taken precisely.
Nigeria is a country with over 140 million persons. In this country, there are Christians, Muslims, Traditionalists, Pagans, Atheists, and what have you. I used religion as the #1 determinant because Nigerians are really religious people. In this heterogeneous society, many people have a big problem, and that is the problem of hate. The average Christian doesn’t like the Muslim, the Muslim feels the Traditionalist isn’t practicing the right religion, and they all hate Atheists because, well, why will you not believe in God? This hate is everywhere, in built in many of us.
What I believe in is simple, and short. Live life, and let others live theirs. When you talk of religion, it may be hard to tackle this because many of these religions preach dislike for other religions, and preach that any religion that isn’t theirs isn’t the true one. I will not talk too much about that. However, many of these beliefs should be cushioned with the fact that all religions preach love, and love includes letting people live the life they believe they enjoy and is best for them. In order words, you are allowed to think of people in a certain way (since we don’t usually control our thoughts) but what you say and do based on these thoughts can be very much controlled. In Nigeria, we have a problem of division because of what we think of our religions and ethnic groups, and how many of them manifest in how we act.
Behavioral differences also exist amongst people. Everyone has the right to decide what kind of life they want to live (so far they are not hurting anyone), and maybe this is where things like smoking, and drug use comes in. A fact remains that drugs are not good or your health- well, sugar also isn’t- but we place a form of cloth over it, and make it seem like it’s totally devoid of morals to take drugs. True, it messes with your senses, and its hazardous to your health, but then, so is the inhalation of chemicals in a lab for a lab worker, and many other things. My point is this. Many Nigerians see smokers in a bad light, but in the end, the drug use (unless it is in form of smoke affecting others) affects just the user, and others have no business calling him out or trash talking him all in the name of helping him.
This extends to sexuality which is also a delicate part of our lives which is affected by religion. Nigerians don’t feel it is OK not to be straight. It’s normal here because even the Law is against it. However, the Law here is nothing to write home about, because this same Law that makes you wonder if Law isn’t overrated. Here in Nigeria, many people would beat up two consenting adults of the same sex who have chosen to have sex with each other without being forced. It goes against human rights in all manners, and only religious reasons can be used to back this up. However, many of these religions also place punishments upon things such as sex between two unmarried people of different sexes. Why, then, is that case not treated with as much hatred as the one involving two persons of the same sex? Perhaps, it is not ‘natural’ to engage in such things, and maybe even those doing it are destroying themselves. However, it does not change the fact that it is their own life, and their decisions affect them.
Not to take things too far, I would like to conclude by reasserting the fact that Nigerians hate too much, judge too much, and bother too much over minor things that should not matter. We have a future that does not seem so bright, yet all we do is harbor hatred in our hearts. Such feeling slows down development, and distracts the entire country from what really needs to be done. Perhaps we should all learn to LIVE, AND LET OTHERS LIVE.

Mr. London President.

President Buhari with APC chieftains

              There is the KKK, Neo Nazis, White supremacists and all what not in the US. There is the terrorist situation that involves the vehicle that rammed into a crowd, killing up to thirteen persons, in Barcelona. There is the deadly situation of mudslides in Sierra-Leone. There is even a chance of a nuclear war between the US and North Korea. Let’s be honest, the world is full of problems. It always has been full of problems. Obviously, you can’t expect complete world peace. There must be tragedies, or drama, or just anything to keep the world busy. Welcome to Nigeria… Oh, wait. You’ve most likely already lived here your whole life. Here, it’s not that bad things happen by chance, or that they happen because ‘something has to happen’ to us here. Many things happen because in Nigeria, some people are in charge, and the rest are not. These ‘some people’ will do everything and anything to please themselves, and if it messes up the rest of the country, then let it. I’ll break it down for you. These ‘people’ are the leaders. You know it. I know it. Everyone knows it. Even the leaders know it. They know that things happen in this country because of their decisions

.

             2015 was a hot year in Nigeria, especially for the All Progressive Congress which ran against the then incumbent party Peoples Democratic Party. Well, Goodluck Johnathan wasn’t any good, and Nigerians had to pick a lesser evil. There came Buhari. Former military dictator. Already ran twice unsuccessfully. Was 73 years old of age. He became a sort of a pragmatic leader that would come and deliver Nigerians from the ‘evil’ PDP. Trust Nigerians. They wouldn’t have more of Johnathan. Nobody cared that the APC had controversial bigwigs such as Tinubu, Rotimi Amaechi, Rochas Okorocha and the rest under it. All they wanted was a #CHANGE from what the PDP gave them for 16 years. In came Buhari. Yay!!! No more Johnathan. No more PDP. No more ‘kwarruption’. #CHANGE #CHANGE #CHANGE in the expectations of all.

           It started with the ear infection. Baba flew to London. Pause there. WHAT?! An ear infection?! Let’s just take a cup of water on that. Our president flew 7 hours to the UK to fix a non-deadly ear issue. If you’re a student in the medical field, or you are there already, the presidency believes you aren’t good enough and that you can never be. Keep it in mind. He went to a UK hospital on taxpayers’ money to fix his ear. Well, the problem was probably not corrected because amidst Nigerians’ complaints, Buhari didn’t hear them, and flew once again to London on a ‘medical vacation’. How do they even have the face to say that the president of a country is going on a medical vacation? This is where the secrecy came in. This is where and when Nigerians should have known that the president and his cabinet believed the president had nobody to question him on his health or any other thing. Baba began to fly up and down. Baba became part time British resident.

          Right now, Its been more than 100 days since Buhari set foot last on Nigerian soil (Unless his cabinet members take soil to London for him). I won’t start telling you that over 30,000,00 USD. (About 10,875,000,000 Naira) has been paid into the UK hospitals for Buhari (Or at least that is how much the Presidency has taken from the National treasury) or the fact that out Presidential Jet is still parked somewhere in the UK (Trust me, millions of Naira go down everyday too on that one). What I will talk about is the fact that some Nigerians eventually came out to speak against this London President of ours, and, well, it didn’t turn out so well for them.

                                                                     Femi Adesina

                                                               Lauretta Onochie

Charles ‘Charly Boy’ Oputa is a legendary Nigerian musician and activist who has never ignored national issues that affect the masses. He saw the state of the nation and decided that there was need for a movement. Therefore, he mobilized an online movement called Our Mumu Don Do which was aimed at awakening Nigerians to protest Buhari’s absence and the government’s misbehavior in general. He also gathered a group of well-meaning Nigerians who started the Resume or Resign sit outs in Abuja urging our London Baba to either return to Nigeria and resume his duty, or resign. Well, history repeated itself a few days ago when the peaceful protest was met with violence from pro-government thugs. I hear about 400 million naira was used to pay the pro-government protesters. Wow, isn’t it? You can’t even talk again. You see evil, you talk, you get beaten up. This is the same government that said they were fighting corruption. This is the same government that had the mouth to criticize Johnathan’s government.

                                                                 Charly Boy Oputa

The APC aren’t helping issues either. Funny thing is, Baba surrounded himself with people who like to lie, people who don’t know many things. One said he doesn’t know who pays the medical bills (SpeciaL Adviser Media and Publicity Femi Adesina) and the other said Baba London is hale ad hearty (Minister of Information Lai Mohammed). One even said it is disrespectful to ask of the president’s health, calling him a private citizen (Lauretta Onochie. I don’t even want to know how she got a seat on the executive)

Our country has a huge problem. And to be honest, I don’t know where we should start.

We'll commence writing in a few days!!!

Criticise Everything fans can get excited now. This is because your favourite write up blog which criticises on going events and world matters is about to bounce back. We promise that this time, we will bring you media news alongside what we think about such news. We apologise for the very long break which kept you waiting. We just need a few days to set up our resources to start bringing to your the write ups. Ensure to share

Victor Nnebe.

                                          Chief Writer.

Bobrisky is Trending.

Idris Okuneye (AKA Bobrisky) is one of Nigeria's questionable celebrity wannabes. He is known for his magical transformation from a black man to something even Michael Jackson couldnt reach

See what i mean?

 And for those that follow Bobrisky on Snapchat, or any social platflorm at that, you must have seen him posting snaps about "bae". Bobrisky is openly gay so nobody is surprised that bae is a man, but recently, bobrisky has shown his IG followers and snap followers that bae is not just for mouth in his own case. He has posted new snaps, telling us that bae sent him 7 million naira.... Oya close your mouth now. This is no joke at all. Well, i dont know if Bobrisky is joking with us to get internet popularity but then this is not the first time bobrisky is yelling bae to everybody. Well, if you do not know, he also says his bae is Africa's fourth richest man. I wont say it with my own mouth. You have Google. He also posted pictures of his journey to the bank to get the 7 million naira.

And twitter went berserk with madness, and the tweets were maddening. All in all, Bobrisky has gotten that attention he has always wanted. Now he is trending.

And the people began to investigate. And this came out.

Observe this. He is firat parked in a Diamond bank . Then, the guy in the counter is putting on an ecobank... and when the money is seen in the Ghana has gone bag, the wraps of money are covered with GT bank... good. I honestly do not know what to say.

Dear Average Nigerian.

Dear Average Nigerian,

 I know words are not what you need, afterall, words are only applicable to those who have enough food in their stomach because an empty stomach does not listen to words. Notwithstanding, I have just a few things to say. As an average Nigerian, and as one who is reading this, you are most likely literate. Not that you have your masters degree yet or you are a professor, but maybe a secondary school certificate holder, an undergraduate or someone that falls into that category. (No, you are not a secondary school student because the reading culture is not in those ones). That is clear.
As an average Nigerian, there are a few things you are "never" satisfied with.

The Government, The Terrorism ,The Poverty... You name them.

And if you are satisfied with any of these aforementioned things, you are not an average Nigerian, or perhaps you are a terrible citizen, or just a blind Buharist. (Buharist: /noun/ One who follows the biddings of the current government out of pure sentiment/ personal gain instead of rationally thinking or criticizing it. Japhet Omojuwa is a Buharist). The terrorism, the poverty, the economy!!! Wow, Average Nigerian, as you would say... "Na wah ooo". Whose fault is it? I have no idea at all! Actually, maybe I do. Maybe we all do. Maybe an average Nigerian's problem is caused by him. Or maybe not! Because we do not know and you do not seek to know.
Come on!, you are educated yet ignorant and higjly selfish. You blame the government of corruption and insurbodination but you would do worse if given the mantle. That is an Average Nigerian.
Maybe you should start with the socialization of newborn. Maybe that is how we will change this country and make it a better place. This will have to involve the schooling system right? Great. Which government will fund that? This one? Or the next few to gain power?
Wait, Average Nigerian, Have you forgotten how power in Africa works? You havent! You know its a case of sit still or transfer power to a political son. Perhaps Buhari will be in power even after he passes away. 
I just have to tell you, Average Nigerian, play your part... Do the right thing. Do not bother others or bother about others. It begins with you.
My words may not havr fed you, it it has probably led you.